Twelve months

This weekend marks one year since Madeline joined us, and we finally are forced to face the peculiar predicament of having a Leap Day baby. Depending on how you look at the situation, either Madeline's birthday is that much more special, or she gets cheated of a birthday three out of every four years.

She was born on February 29 - which, of course, is the day after Feb. 28. Most years that day will be March 1. But Madeline was born in February, so it seems odd to celebrate the anniversary of her arrival in March. She's a February baby. So which will it be?

I felt a little sad today as I thought about how Madeline doesn't have that special day every year - the day that everyone focuses on her. Most years she'll just get a rough approximation. On the other hand, it's all she'll know. It's not like she's having her birthday taken from her - it's the only birthday she's ever had, and we'll figure out how to handle it each year (and when that fourth year rolls around we'll really go crazy!).

This year has been pretty easy. March 1 falls on a Sunday - my regular day off work and a day that's convenient for family members to come share cake with us. I gave Madeline my gift this morning, on Feb. 28, to get the birthday weekend started. It was a rubber ball, and she gave me the warmest thanks I could have wanted when she actually removed the wrapping paper so she could play with the ball, rather than removing the ball so she could play with the wrapping paper.

Madeline's first birthday has touched me in a different way than the other big holidays we've celebrated over the past year. I was so happy to have her with us on Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas, but her birthday is the first occasion we've celebrated just because of her. It's Madeline's day. The presents, the decorations, the cake, the visitors - it's all for her. And perhaps therein lies the reason I sometimes feel bad about her Leap Day birthday - I love her so much and want her to have that special day each year that she can call her own.

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Looking at the photos at the top of this post, it's easy to see how far Madeline has come over the past twelve months. I've thought so much about what I could write to commemorate this first year, but all the words seem woefully inadequate. How do I describe what's taken place? I'm a different person now - to appreciate my current self I would need to see from the perspective of my former self, a person who is becoming ever more distant. Madeline has changed everything; she's the prism through which I view every aspect of my life. It's on her birthday, whichever day we choose to celebrate it, that I'm most thankful for the best gift I've ever received.

Happy birthday, Madeline!

The fifty-second week

Madeline has been having some teething trouble over the past few days - more than she's had with her previous teeth. She's been grumpy before, and had a little trouble sleeping, but this time is different. She's in obvious discomfort - crying often and needing to be held. She's been running a slight fever and waking often during the night. We're hoping she gets better soon, especially since her birthday is this weekend.

And speaking of Madeline's birthday, this will be the last weekly wrap-up that I post here. I started the weekly update on her very first week with us, and it became something that I continued every Friday, making notes of the most interesting things that happened that week - moments, issues and thoughts that might easily be forgotten without documentation. Change comes so quickly with a newborn that those moments become lost in the haze. Some weeks were more exciting than others, but I guess the same could be said of anyone's life.

I'll still be posting plenty of pictures and stories about Madeline - this site is a great way to share her life with friends and family. I'm sure her second year will be just as exciting as the first!

Reading

Madeline has taken her love of books to a new level. She has a handful of favorites - generally books that involve mommy or daddy making crazy noises and faces. Books such as "Baby Farm Animals" and "Monkey and Me." She also loves the Curious George Christmas book - maybe she recognizes a cartoon version of George?

When she's ready for a story, Madeline will find the book she wants (sometimes moving aside other books that may be in the way) and bring the book to mommy or daddy. Once we take it from her she'll move excitedly next to us as we begin to read. She stands and points at the pages and often offers her own commentary. When she's ready to move on she turns the pages.

Although it can become tedious for us to continue making pig noises or reading the same book several times in a row, it's obvious that Madeline loves it. And seeing her love it so much makes it easier for me to keep on "oink, oink, oink"-ing with gusto.

Walking with Daddy

I took this photo recently while Madeline and I were playing at our local playground. It was the first time she had explored this playground on her own two feet, and while she was excited to check out all the new and interesting stuff, she still wanted to make sure Daddy was close by.

New kicks

Yesterday our little family made a trip to the local mall to find some new shoes for Madeline. Until now she's been wearing flexible leather infant shoes - they're fine for around the house but fall short of what an active toddler requires when toddling out in the world.

We went to the Stride-Rite store where we found little shoes (for not-so-little prices, I might add). We found a good pair that are sturdy but flexible and easy to get on and off - a key requirement for our squirmy child. It was interesting that all the little girls' shoes were either completely pink or were adorned with heavy pink accents, while the little boys' shoes came in a variety of more natural colors. Why does girls' stuff always have to be pink? I digress.

Yesterday's was a different kind of outing for us. We had a single errand but let ourselves adapt to the situation. In other words, we just hung out at the mall. We ate lunch at the food court, we shopped for shoes and we played in the bookstore for a while.

It's hard for me to describe how I felt watching Madeline be a part of the world. To watch as she walked happily around the shoe store, got her tiny feet measured (size 4), and watched other kids try on shoes. In the bookstore we just put her down and she followed us across the store, stopping to look at books and then playing with the train set with the other kids in the children's section.

She's turning into a kid now. She's not just our baby who needs to be carried everywhere and tended at all times. She's a little person who's aware of other people and aware of herself. I guess it's like I feel proud of her for what she's doing every day. It's fulfilling for me to watch her think and solve problems and make associations. And I guess I'm feeling a little more sensitive to these thoughts as we approach the end of her first year. It's such a huge milestone and she's come so far in the past 12 months.

Oh, and she loves the new shoes. She walked a figure-8 pattern around our downstairs for literally 15 minutes straight when we got home from the mall. Most of the time she was staring down at her feet, listening to the interesting new "clomp-clomp-clomp" sound the rubber soles made on our floors.

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People familiar with our house will notice in the picture above that the Exersaucer has been retired. Of course Madeline has been walking for about five weeks now and we've had little use for the Exersaucer since she started toddling. Its time has passed, but it certainly served us well.

The fifty-first week

When Madeline started experimenting with mobility - rolling over, crawling, pulling up and, finally, walking - I knew we couldn't let her out of our sight for a moment. Not only did we not know what she would get in to, but we weren't confident of her abilities to get around without injuring herself.

But Madeline's been walking for more than a month now, and we've been backing off a little. She's good enough at walking that she can maneuver around obstacles, she can steady herself when she gets caught on something, and she can navigate with ease the ledge in our front entryway. And after several months of trial and error, our home seems to be mostly childproofed.

These days we don't follow two steps behind when Madeline wanders into the next room. She often flits from place to place, playing with toys and other things she finds along the way. We're growing more comfortable in letting her roam alone.

This is a bit of independence that we welcome - the fact that she can entertain herself for a little while as we're preparing a meal or are otherwise occupied with household responsibilities. We're still never far away, and we check in when she's in another room, but it's nice not having to hover whenever she wants to walk around (which is pretty much all the time!).

Kickin' it

As Madeline becomes more sure of her walking abilities, she can focus on other things while she's traipsing about (such as dancing and walking with stuff). Now she's kicking, too.

A few nights ago we put her favorite ball on the floor and, instead of picking it up, she started kicking it around. She would kick it and chase it repeatedly, occasionally having to dig it out of a corner or a tight spot.

She's shown before that she likes to kick things - she did it months ago when she still needed help walking around. But now she's starting to do it on her own. Yesterday she even found a small Tupperware container of Cheerios and kicked it around on the floor for several minutes.

She's a carrier

Madeline loves to carry stuff. And the more of it, the better. Sometimes she'll spend 20 minutes just trying to walk across the room while holding two things in the same hand - not a single whine or whimper as the first object slips from her grasp when the second is introduced. She just quietly works to hold both items, and when she has them she begins to walk, until one or both invariably falls from her hands.

She has even been known to walk with both hands full and another object in her mouth. Who knows where she's taking all this stuff, because she never makes it to a destination. The goal just seems to be holding several things and walking at the same time.

It's obvious that Madeline is fine-tuning her manual dexterity and balance, and at the same time she's learning about the physical nature of objects - how they feel and how they interact with the environment. I think it's pretty fun to watch, especially during those few precious moments when she succeeds - to see how happy she is when she finally manages a few steps with her little hands full of toys.

Busted

Madeline's walking skills have blossomed over the past month - so much so that walking is becoming more secondary. Instead of walking for walking's sake, she's walking while playing with a toy (or two) or walking to get somewhere. And, although she's usually pretty skilled at keeping her balance and correcting herself when teetering, she occasionally experiences a tumble. And some of those tumbles bring her squarely in contact with something painful.

Almost every day she has some new scratch or bruise, and this weekend is no different. Yesterday she was walking and playing with my camera's lens cap when she stumbled face-first into the corner of a wooden chair leg. Today her left cheek bears a shiny reminder.

I wrote a couple months ago about the potential danger she faces when walking around. Generally I've remained laid-back, but sometimes I know to stay close. Most of the time, however, it's impossible to save her from injury. She walks everywhere now, and in a moment she can be somewhere else. And she's so good at walking that it's harder to anticipate when she might fall.

Fortunately her injuries have been pretty minor, and they don't seem to bother her once the initial moment has passed. And, as much as I hate to see her cute little face marred by a bruise or scrape, I know that it's an unavoidable part of toddlerhood.

The fiftieth week

Having been a toddler for several weeks now, it's only logical that Madeline has moved on to the next thing - dancing. Whenever we turn on some music she stops what she's doing and begins to bob up and down, flexing at the knees and thrusting her hips forward. She even adjusts her speed to match the music. And the music could be just about anything - tunes on the computer (as seen in the video above), mommy whistling or even a cell phone.

Also this week Madeline has discovered another piece of the mobility puzzle - she can stand up on her own. Until now she's needed support - a piece of furniture, an adult's leg, etc. - to pull herself up before walking around. She was growing visibly frustrated by this need, especially when she would tumble far away from the nearest object. But now she can just stand right back up without that extra support. She's so good at walking and stooping to pick up objects on the floor that it's not often she needs to get herself up, but it's another tool in her ever-expanding toolbox.